Remembering

In the next week I will begin volunteering as a grief group leader at a local grief center. It, of course, has me thinking about my grandfather and realizing that I want to remember him more purposively and with more regularity. So I think I will occasionally share a story here.

My grandfather was not much of a talker. Don't get me wrong, he could talk but he often chose not to. Or, a more plausible explanation is that he probably didn't have a lot of space to talk with Honey around! :)

One of the very first things that surprised me about the husband (before he was the husband) was the way he treated my grandparents. My grandfather had an affinity for the husband and he would often spend quite a bit of time talking with him at family get-togethers. I will always cherish the memories of the times when I would peer into the next room and see the two of them talking. As my grandfather became less capable of remembering and conversations became repetitive, the husband's gentle way with him - his compassion for him - was heartwarming.

After my grandfather's funeral, as we were all busying ourselves in an effort to fend off grief, it was the husband who found my grandmother alone in the dining room and sat with her and comforted her. I will always remember the way they looked together, sitting at the dining room table, Honey in her head-of-the-table seat and the husband in what is normally my seat. Forever I will remember how he looked when he turned to face me and, when we were by ourselves later, how upset he was when he told me that she was alone, that we had left her alone.